Saturday, April 22, 2017

Vaccinations Linked To Ruining Houston's NBA Playoff Run

Here's a missed opportunity by the crowd that generates the numbers. It's well documented here how the numbers are pretty much an afterthought...easily manufactured with the loose and unstructured rules. So I will only detail the outline of this conspiracy.


1. Current events. Got to have sports. Lots of numbers. News. Minnesota having an outbreak of mumps. Very interesting. Gophers have puffy cheeks, just like people with mumps.
2. Drag in as much other marginally relevant source material as possible. It helps if you have a good memory like me. Internet is always a grew source. Time to get researching. Need some film stuff. Gophers - old cartoon Go Go Gophers. Aired with Underdog. Great, now anything related to that is fair game. Mumps are vaccinated to prevent. Autism (falsely) linked to vaccinations. Bingo! Jenny McCarthy.
3. No need to recreate the wheel. I already have previous numbers on Houston and space. Oh cool! What a break. The Gophers cartoon has an episode with a space rocket! I also talked about giraffes. Well, the Minnesota medical researchers studied if autism was more prevalent in Somali children, April the Giraffe is a Somali giraffe. Just tuck that in there with a lead in like, "Interesting also is that April the Somali Giraffe was just in the news...."
4. Get on the computer and crunch numbers. It is virtually impossible to not find "connections" using all this, by their own low standards, legitimate source data.
5. Tie it all together. But DON'T make a final prediction. You are Captain Hindsight from South Park. Just say, "We'll document this now and see if it means Houston will be eliminated because of vaccination caused autism.". Doesn't hurt any that they aren't the number one seed.
6. Pop it all under an eye catching title...get more hits.

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