The second biggest day of the month passed by with a timid whimper and not too much fanfare. After ignoring Pythagorean Theorem Day on 8/15/17 I expected a fuss on the big day numerology had been building up to for months. The solar eclipse on 8/21.
And that's your problem. Ritual sacrifice don't work dat way. From what I've been told, read about and lack of results from experimentation with my neighbors' miniature poodles. No, I'm joking. My neighbors don't have dogs. Anymore.
I could make up something totally fictional here. Tuathicoitl, demon brother of Attu the Wonder Turtle. Nice little pun set up for interruption of the sacrifice and a Tuathicoitl interruptus joke. That's enough to get punning out of my system for a bit, so I turn to Hollywood for a real example of sacrifice. I have numerous choices.
I'm going to pick Kolchak, The Night Stalker. Because I loved the show. This is an Aztec ritual, but from what I understand the basics are the same. Erik Estrada, yeah the CHIPS guy, is a pampered brat. He's got money, nice toys like expensive cars and bling, and women out the wazoo. Because he's in league with a bunch of Quetzalcoatl worshippers and needs to sacrifice humans every year to maintain his good standing. Quetzy gets beating hearts. Erik gets laid for another year. Karl gets another story. Except things go wrong and the final sacrifice (in a football stadium! Rigged sacrifice!) Quetzy gets all huffy.
In theory, Quetzy could have ordained that if the sacrifices were not completed to his satisfaction that he would wreak his vengeance by blotting out the Sun for a couple of minutes. Vengeful gods don't generally work that way. In our Kolchak episode, snuffing out the lives of the sacrificial bunglers is much more appropriate and what occurred. Fast forward to 2017, "I the mighty Quetzy, demand the destruction of several buildings and death of certain celebrities, all to be determined later, or I will visit my wrath upon you and blot the Sun out for a couple of minutes, thereby enticing people to sit around in lawn chairs drinking alcohol all morning, buying overpriced sunglasses and forcing a shortage of shoeboxes to make cheap ass solar eclipse viewers, and if you don't appease me I will burn your retinas. And if you do appease me...aw fuck it, I had this eclipse planned out a long time ago, so I'm gonna do it anyway."
Glen Campbell. Murdered as a precursor to the upcoming solar eclipse. Grenfell Towers. Yep. Upcoming solar eclipse. Lots of others. Sure you're going to claim that these are designed to make sure the eclipse is going to happen. Or what? Eternal darkness? No clues? Can't you give me something better than, "Glen will still be dead!"?
What we have is not bizarre ritualistic sacrifices, but a bizarre form of Tindering. Tindering in advance. Since gematria sucks ass at predicting celebrity deaths in advance, now I guess every major event we KNOW is going to happen, scientifically, is now fair game to be proclaimed an anniversary. Add it it to the list. Celebrity birthday is a date to do numerology on. Death date, which can vary anytime up to and including the event date, sports championship dates, album release dates. And of course the day before and after each of these days depending on what you declare as the span if you use the end date or not.
In real sacrificial situations another reason is to off some slaves or something so your beloved (or despised but feared) king has some flunkies around in the afterlife to trim his nails and run out to Starbucks for a cappuccino or something. But, the king, no matter how despised, is not the sacrifice. It's the flunkies. People generally linger on for a bit even if the end is near. So now you are bypassing the problem of nailing down the celebrity date of the death by.....reporting it after the fact, as always. But it's for an event that is or is not going to happen regardless? Yeah, that makes all kinds if fucking sense.
I turned Lucy Furcertain loose on this. Since there's usually not too much time between the infraction of not completing the ritual and the godly retribution I instructed her to focus on 8/21 and 8/22. Just in case the freemason coroner was wrong about date of death. Hungover from too much lounge chair grog and/or partially retinal damaged. Not too much to go with. Bodybuilder Dallas McCarver was 26. Young sacrifices seem to be a good bet. Wrathful gods like 'em young. But he had the indecency to die of choking. Doesn't seem right for a fiery eclipse thingie. 100 year old cricket player, boring. Pneumonia, heart failure, boring.
Well here we go. Dianne de Las Casas. Filipino born author. Despite Filipino being spelled correctly this looks promising. My high school Spanish tells me that her name translates to "Dianne of the Houses". She died in a house fire. That's freaking weird. She was 47. Not really young, yet not ancient. Died early. And she wrote children's books. Wrathful gods like virginal stuff. Offing a kiddy book writer seems pretty fitting. Not convinced yet? Book title, The Cajun Cornbread Boy. Sacrificing blood for the upcoming corn harvest! Maybe she vacationed in Nebraska recently. Another book, The House That Witchy Built. Bingo, this is our gal, for sure.
And of course not a peep from the so called astute numerology researchers. Because why bother with someone semi-famous when I can pick any date I want to do numerology on?
Which reminds me of two other points. Where mixing word numerology with date numerology became accepted is a mystery. And as far as this event, you picked an event that we knew so much about WAYYYYYYY in advance we knew exact times when and where the total eclipse would happen. If we used 22/7 for Pi, we would have been off by a little bit. Not exactly sure how specific wrathful gods are about this stuff, but I would tend to think that 8/8, Glen Campbell's death, might be jumping the gun a lot.
Most people think of Freemasonry in the Simpsons style sense of a bunch of crotchety old farts sitting in a musty castle swilling booze. As far as their involvement or any other nearly infinitely powered entity being involved it looks like the eclipse was just an excuse to get outside for a tailgate with their cardboard box eclipse viewer. Now it's fun to throw around cool sounding words like rite, ritual, sacrifice and so on when we belittle the deaths of people. And in the case of Glen. Massacre. If you look up massacre the term doesn't usually apply to one person. So where are the others? Massacre sure does sound nice in a bogus narrative, eh?
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