Another Apufeemic Simpsons

This one is for real. You can look this up and verify I'm not making this one up.


From season 20, Gone Maggie Gone.


I don't understand how this couldn't even get a mention with the solar eclipse being the huge sacrificial rage that killed people weeks in advance. A huge part of the plot is a solar eclipse.


Marge gets temporarily blinded by looking at it. Maggie is a sacred jewel that the nuns are looking for. Lisa goes undercover in the convent to find missing Maggie. And, I'm really not making this up. We hear how the jewel was hidden and Freemasons led by George Washington, Ben Franklin and King George stage a hoax revolutionary war to cover up their search for the missing jewel. There's other occult references, but Freemasons mentioned by name alone should have gotten someone's attention. Instead the most recent Truther video is about Johnny Depp and Amber Heard. I found the episode on YouTube and not from a gematria user. Thousands of comments and although I didn't have time to scan them all it wasn't about the numbers. Mostly apocalypse and religion stuff.


An entire Simpsons episode with Freemasons and the solar eclipse. I waited this long to see if anybody noticed by now and not a peep. Your standards of what's important to report on are bizarre. Johnny Depp? Geez...


My readers expect some sort of mockery from me, so I can't disappoint them. I believe this should suffice.


Some of the occult like goings on are related to puzzles. Included is a fairly famous logic puzzle that involves crossing a river with a rowboat. There are three items each one not to be left alone with another of the other two. In this Simpsons version Homer, Maggie, Santas Little Helper (the dog, if you don't watch the show) and a bottle of poison need to get across the river. All together they are too heavy. Homer has to row the boat. Maggie can't be left alone with the poison. The dog can't be left alone with Maggie. Only Homer and two other items can be in the boat at the same time.




The Gematria Variation. These numerologies are real. You can check them out.


Homer is an allegory for a normal person. He's just the transporter. HOMER SIMPSON and NORMAL PERSON both equal 160 and 164. DOG and STUPIDITY both equal 55. POISON and SANITY both equal 88. NUMEROLOGIST and MAGGIE SIMPSON both equal 66. STUPIDITY and the NUMEROLOGIST are safe alone together. But the NUMEROLOGIST can't be left alone with SANITY. STUPIDITY and SANITY can't get along.


Now, I take a break from the set up. If you are not familiar with the classic solution you might want to try and figure it out on your own. There's a hint below.


The Gematria style lack of logic solution:


The Normal Person takes the numerologist and sanity together in the boat. Forgetting that he is in a famous logic problem the numerologist thinks he is instead in the parable of the frog and scorpion crossing the river. Unable to take it any more the normal person commits suicide by throwing himself overboard and drowns, taking any chance for sanity with him. Left alone, stupidity withers and dies on the shore line. The numerologist doesn't know how to row and dies of starvation. Quentin Tarantino buys the screenplay and turns it into a Johnny Depp movie.


Yes, I realize that the matches are not the exact same in regards to poison/baby/dog to the modified version. Poor Maggie. It's not my fault that this is what the numerology says. Now the hint: The key is that the Sanity can't be left alone with either. Or in the case of the Simpsons, Maggie can't be left alone with either. Hint #2. You can make more than one trip.