At the end credits of the Get Smart! TV show, Smart (Don Adams treks down a barren hallway with multiple security doors. As the journey ends, these doors close begin to close behind him, one by one. Until that last one that doesn’t shut, luring him to step back to check it out and booping his nose at it finally does close.
Of course, this is done for the comedy value as this is a comedy series. If you do intellectualize this, you realize that multiple doors aren’t really necessary. One, absolutely. Two, maybe a good idea if the first fails. Three, now you’re pushing it. After that, is there really any point. In a barren hallway? And why not some other security measures, like an armed guard with an attack dog?
Real espionage is *boring*. Crazy stupid levels of boring sifting through computer files, papers and mindless grunt work. And sending in a team to do the work is too many moving parts, since those extra parts, like our extra doors, just give extra chances for something to go wrong.
One of the hallmarks of a good (bad) conspiracy theory is the insinuation that it’s super large and part of the reason the conspiracy continues is the overwhelming number of people in on it. Your shadowy evil empire ruling over everything you do. Ultimately, thanks to grift and crank magnetism chiming in to add more moving parts these bullshit conspiracies include everyone but the conspiracist being in on it.
For other real examples:
1). The assassination of Caesar. Part of the idea was a show of strength in numbers. It’s not just a couple of angry upstarts, but dozens of high profile people united in a goal to stop what they deemed to be a serious problem. Don’t be thinking, “Wait a second sunshine, it worked! They did kill him.” True, but ultimately their end goal was not achieved. Caesar’s martyrdom and the end of the Roman Republic. Too many moving parts as the general population had other ideas. Note though in the buildup to the killing the description of the painstaking efforts to carefully select and groom the conspirators for fear of the plot being uncovered before the deed was done.
2). The plot to kill Hitler. A more classical scenario where the plot was not successful. Assassination survivors don’t like to be targets and the aftermath was not pleasant for some 7,000 people, many of which were executed. The idea of using a briefcase filled with explosives never included the extra moving part of some random dude moving the briefcase off its assigned location to do the intended job.
Most of the failed bullshit conspiracy theories combine unexplained elements of these experiments, as well as the overestimation of the number people involved. Turning to an old favorite, chemtrails (gematria is way too easy since every single person that ever lived, is alive and will live is evil based on gematria).
I should note also that I saw a new name for them. Sky tampons. That’s kind of cute. Planes producing contrails fly every day. These are starkly visible on normal days. So if they are part of a plot to poison the general population. How many other people are involved. They’re indiscriminate, dropping their poison on potential conspirators. So add all the staff producing counter agents or whatever to the toxins. Better get all the hospitals in on it, just in case. Certainly the flight crews know. The ground crews fueling the planes. Air traffic controllers dealing with not poison spreading twin engine Cessnas.
And there’s the conspiracy theorists pointing out the poisoning. All those other moving parts require care and secrecy to keep the conspiracy under wraps. Somehow, despite decades of poisoning there’s no direct violent response by the perpetrators to those that have uncovered the scheme. Ultimately, real conspiracies involve lots of money. There may be a shorter term aspect of political control that ultimately leads to a monetary reason. And dealing with a population of billions of angry, poisoned people would be a helluva lot more expensive. Killing people in expensive ways so you can keep them under control doesn’t give you a controlled population. It gives you dead people. Way too many moving parts for that to work.
The grift magnetism crowd loves to make up all kinds of interesting side stories about how their failures in predictions don’t come to fruition. “They flipped the script on that sports game because I’M getting too close to the truth.” “That billion dollar judgment is trying to silence me because I’M right about everything.” Sure. Whatever. Just keep adding more moving parts to a machine that already is doomed to breakdown.
Ironically, real conspiracies are NEVER uncovered by conspiracy theorists.
Sometimes it’s a government agency that takes a break from ineptitude and honors that oath of office they took. Sometimes it’s a legit investigative reporter, which helps with the MLM is evil narrative of the grifters. And sometimes it’s too many moving parts and someone grows a conscience. It’s never a random person on the internet who can be directly asking for funding openly, or can at least be easily traced to someone else asking you for money.
Legitimate conspiracies don’t need you to send random people money. The issue is out in the open now. Legitimate conspiracies rightfully show that there are reasons do mistrust even your own government. These in no way prove the wacko conspiracies with way too many moving parts exist. If you want to be taken seriously, stop sending random people money, save it up and take some journalism classes. Or blow the whistle on that school board member spouting baseless Qanon gematria based accusations on Facebook. Or contact a legitimate government agency about how you heard that car makers were cheating on diesel emissions testing. Picking and choosing your battles is easier when you don’t involve sending money to random oddballs on the internet.
No comments:
Post a Comment