Yesterday the Department of Gematria Economics (D.O.G.E.) released their annual report on the fiscal year end of December 30, 2024. (Yes, that’s correct. The 30th and not the 31st. In the time honored gematria tradition I f being “close enough”.
And things are really not looking good at all. The various gematria calculators have once again not been updated for the rampant inflation plaguing global economies. The newly appointed unelected bureaucrat heading the department, known only as “Some guy named Sam who delivers the GrubHub lunches”, pretty much overqualified for his post in this administration, summed it up this way.
“Yeah, like holy shit man. I can’t believe INFLATION still just equals 100. Because since you always drop zeroes except when you don’t, that’s 1. You would think it might have at least gone up to 2 by now.”
When asked for further comment he fidgeted and shyly admitted he didn’t know why he should have even bothered saying anything to our reporters. Something to do with lack of job security because his Uncle, although one of the original founding fathers who signed on the Declaration of Independence was technically an immigrant and he feared his being labeled as an obvious scapegoat meant that the axe would fall any day.
The next report is due out in the middle of tropical storm season in the United States. Market watchers are nervously anticipating the obvious upcoming clusterfuck of a response by the gutted institutions trying to clean up the physical and financial mess. If HURRICANE still equals 97 then this is a definite sign of not adapting to changing times and for the Department of Gematria Economics to step in and bolster the price of Bitcoin and other crypto. Fake money solves everything.
No comments:
Post a Comment