The War on Zero

You’ve heard about the War on Christmas, right?  That’s not a war fought on Christmas Day, but the war that is being fought to maintain Christmas as the proper Christian holiday that it is.  I’m not taking sides here, just pointing out the obvious that billions of people have different views on whether that’s the “proper” thing to do.

Combine that with politics and you get the full load of topics discussed at family holiday feasts that ruin it.  Increasingly, especially ‘Merica, politics is treated more like a football game where it’s the end of the world if pouty little snowflakes don’t get their way.  (Using some of the lingo sure to ruin the holiday feast.)  Memorial Day is a perfect testing ground for the solution.  Turning the conversation away from something that should have meaning but gets trivialized towards something inherently trivial.  Gematria, specifically the War on Zero and whether you drop them or not.

Gematria to the rescue.  Because screwed up math ruins everything.  Actual binary is 0 or 1.  All the bickering about the War on Christmas and politics can be set aside and limited to holiday feast conversations about whether zeroes are dropped or not in gematria.  Certainly it doesn’t matter if the meal is prepared for 1, 10, or 100 people.  Or does it?  Since the answer is, “It depends” that’s a perfect substitute for talking religion or politics while stuffing your face.

Recent output has Hubbard posting on Twixter that 201 may be the most evil number ever.  Because certainly some numbers are more evil even though all are evil and there’s no need to worry about whether that’s 21 instead of 201 and you’re safer for it being less evil.  And the Gematrinator thinks 6,900 is just 69.  Because, sure.  Why not.  Usually there’s only one zero to drop.  And 69 is perfect for the upcoming Memorial Day holiday feast - somebody ate something.

Do not let them exclude you from the conversation by not inviting you.  Send them text messages if they haven’t blocked you.

If things go well, a thousand years (of next year dropping zeroes) Memorial Day will be known as memorializing the end of arguing over things that require context, subtlety and nuance and replaced with talking about complete bullshit, laughing it off, eating a big meal and watching the Memorial Day football games on TV, enjoying the game for the sake of a part of a pleasant social occasion instead of getting dragged through the mud.

Maybe years from now you and Dad and Grandpa can go out on the back porch after the game is over.  Smoke a cigar and drink a brewski and talk respectfully about the numbers between 0 and 1.  But there’s no way the world is ready for that right now.