Saturday, November 7, 2026

Godzstalgia

It is my honor to be a pretentious douchebag and spoil Godzilla Minus Zero for you if you haven’t seen it.

Like many children growing up in the 60s and 70s I became fascinated with dinosaurs.  So Godzilla was a must watch.  Every weekend one of these.  And I didn’t know enough about real world crises to understand anything beyond the simplistic dichotomy.  Godzilla = good.  Other monster = bad.  Nuance wasn’t important, these were the family friendly Japanese films, a franchise intended for profit more than epic story telling.  And quite fun for a kid who wasn’t supposed to be exposed to the first two of this Showa era of Godzilla.

Way oversimplified it had a message.  You nuked us.  Ordinary, innocent civilians got nuked.  A very naughty topic subject to scrutiny of all governments trying to cope with Cold War fears.  Over the 20ish years of Showa era Godzilla, other than these first two, there was just one that went outside the kiddie comic books dichotomy.  Godzilla Vs. The Smog Monster.  Pollution is the enemy.  So in addition to two gigantic monsters clomping around until an excuse is made for a big showdown, the naughty topic of pollution was brought up.  Naughty, because propaganda suggests burning up fossil fuels = always good because money = always good.  Extremely naughty topic because instead of a culture war Americans = nuclear villains = bad, Japan as a group of tiny little islands with way more people than natural resources can support has had, oh mercury in fish meat among other more mundane pollution problems.

Godzilla Minus One lay cooking in fertile brains as Godzilla shuffled through more monster vs monster standard movie stuff.  Shit blows up.  Bad monster dies.  Catharsis achieved.  And despite scripts trying at times or not even bothering it’s hard to feel much concern for the idiot humans involved.  Even the children.  Brandon Tenold on YouTube calls them “Kennys.”  A very young child you’re *supposed* to care about, but is so annoying you wish Godzilla would accidentally stomp on him.  Fortunately the child Kennys would grow up into stupid sexy teens and get an harpoon in the chest in slasher films, but that’s for another day.  

Until Godzilla Minus One.  Actual character development.  Actual skill, craft, and effort into something that just so happens to have a giant monster in it.  Something to chew on.

So, people being people, when the sequel was announced it was speculation time.  Would there be a monster for Godzilla to fight?  If so, which one.  People *cared* about the big lizard and humans more than they had since Millie Bobby Brown didn’t gain her official Kenny (Kendra?) status.  And Hedorah was on the list.  People wanted it to be a possibility.  A relevant societal point with actual investment in a good story?

And then the announcements were teased out after much vague pre-teasing to add to the speculation that worked like a charm.  It was going to be King Ghidorah, the three headed dragon monster.  A worthy choice for Godzstalgia fans, but how would the societal relevance be achieved?

And now the spoilers.  They went back to the old classic, the atomic bomb.  It’s set in the 1940s, so yeah.  But here’s what they added in.  The way I took it.

Godzilla and Ghidorah through sci fi magic technology stuff are lured into close proximity.  Yeah!  A proxy war!  Because the U.S. military brass secretly wants the “how to control Godzilla” technology.  And they haven’t forgotten about the You Nuked Us! revenge stuff.  A dream sequence from the mad scientist who made the magic controlling Godzilla thing.  He’s pissed.  He survived Hiroshima, his family did not.  He yearns to lure Godzilla to New York City and give ‘em a taste of their own medicine.  Statue of Liberty destroyed.  New York in flames.  First R rating in Godzilla history achieved.

And it wasn’t censored, which you might expect in Trumpmerica.

Ultimately, the human pawns figure out they’re being used.  They go through with the basic create a monster vs. monster fight because - two things can be wrong at the same time.  A chance to stop one is better than both being a problem forever.  The key to the solution is foreshadowed.  To awaken Godzilla they track him down while he’s slumbering or watching  reruns of Kevin Sorbo in Hercules or whatever.  Instead of immediately doing more city destruction he swims off into the sea.  The force of nature angle, he really just wants to be left alone.  The only friends he needs are the sequel bait chummed into the 2 hour + run time.

A fully satisfying end to the monster side of things.  The human side, the lure King Ghidorah sci fi magic guy - he’s a good bloke.  So yeah, the smart and empathetic people have to make sacrifices, so he’s dead.  The Nuke New York guy grows a conscience literally overnight and decides to stick it to the U.S. military by plotting and succeeding in burning all his secret device blueprints.  The family from the first movie, Kendra is growing up too quick.  Her parents are accepting that after their crimes (from the U.S. military point of view) they are going to be fugitives forever.  They see Kendra who has a character name of Akiko one last time to say goodbye.  And we get the satisfaction of not wanting Godzilla to crush her.  The family in full motorbikes away into the sunset.

But one last go ahead and censor us you want message from the film.  It’s about revenge and is the solution worse than the problem.  A topic personal to me, since I’m really sick of being the one to say, “Fuck you, asshole” to people that are clearly assholes.  There’s no way the film went the direction it did with the U.S. midterm election slaughter in mind.  Steve Shives who I’ve recommended before had this to say about getting even:


If you allow yourself to get carried away, aren’t you just as bad or worse than the source of your anxiety?  Godzilla movies are saying to think about it - two things can be wrong at the same time.



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