Playing the Haarpsichord

 

When natural disasters hit, those of us with even a bit of empathy can have images of the disaster strike a chord with us.  For the conspiracy grifter, it’s an opportunity to play the HAARPshicord.  The solution to fund rebuilding the devastation is not to cooperate with emergency aid agencies like the Red Cross.  It’s not to offer support to arms of the military like the National Guard that might be involved.  It’s not even to donate via a convenient link off a Facebook page that might actually have a portion to do some good.  No, it’s to whine, complain point a finger at the government and insist it’s their fault, and the only viable solution is to donate that money to them.

That’s right kiddos,  if you subscribe to a scheme to bet on NFL football games you can stop the military from making another hurricane.

Now I could go on about how a large part of the blame lies in the impending insurance/inflation bubble and how insurance is unaffordable and they just don’t want to pay out on valid claims, blah, blah, blah…but we just did the fighter jet meme so let’s stick with the crazy conspiracy stuff.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/High-frequency_Active_Auroral_Research_Program

Under the conspiracy theory section there’s also some domestic terrorism activity.  More wasted resources.  So there’s even more shrinkage on top of the actual storm damage.

The power level of HAARP doesn’t even scale to a lightning flash, much less a full fledged major hurricane.  But it’s one of those undying quickie comments the fledgling conspiracy theorist learns.  Why bother when you can just whine like a little baby about how something went wrong you have no control over.  I have actually seen the single word in the comments of completely unrelated conspiracy content.  Someone will mention the big cloud in the picture put up about a flat earth video.  Some jackass will just reply, “HAARP!”  Actually, it’s maybe more common to misspell it as HARP.  One word that they think instantly catapults them to conspiracy stardom even though the regulars have heard it a billion times before.  Add HAARP/HARP to the list of overused conspiracy lingo that proves you have no business being at the adult table, or on the internet at all.

Looking ahead to the rest of this hurricane season - we haven’t seen our last haarpsichord concert.  Maybe it won’t be as bold and big but we’re due for a couple more.  So let’s talk about the top image.  Apparently HAARP destruction by the military technology not operating at full capacity, yet.  They’ve managed to wipe out a big section of road.  (Yes, that’s an actual image of 2024 Helene damage.)  So the plan must be super secret conspiracy stuff like:

1)  Use HAARP (in Alaska) to damage road in rural southern U.S.

2) Get funding to send military out and federal aid to fix the damage.

3) Siphon off a portion of those dollars secretly to improve HAARP.

4) Get people to blame the insurance industry for raising rates and insist that it’s the fault of Democrats currently in office.

5)  Use improved HAARP technology to damage more shit later.

At least that’s what I would do.  If I was insane.  And how someone that specializes in begging for Patreon subscriptions to get sports bets right about half the time is another piece to learn on the haarpsichord.  Bad weather messes up games and affordability of attending those games.  So when Earth turns into Bradbury’s vision of Venus* it’s gonna be tough for them to work that out.

But actually explaining something even if it’s ludicrous is not the goal of the conspiracy grifter.  It’s looking for who is gullible enough to put the replies of HAARP! in the comments.  That’s money in the bank with one short word.

*All Summer in a Day

Gematria Causes Inflation

It’s sad because it’s true.  And this goes for the lefties that are starting to court ideas that are dangerously close to a Kamala cult, too.  One of the advantages of capitalism is a motivation to team up and create a group of people to produce something of value that can be traded in for something that represents value that can be traded in for food, water, a roof over your head, etc….  Or maybe that’s etc……., I can’t tell anymore.  And we’ll get to that.

People tend to go crazy over a subject they are passionate about, and buying swag instead of just the equipment is the way to proudly declare your individuality.  If you collect comic books, you need to buy comic books.  Do you *need* to take a second job to afford that mint condition issue #1 of your favorite?  Does the wealthy 1%er *need* a second yacht?  Do you need to hoard eggs when they are two for the price of one today and they’ll go bad before they use them all?

Our friends that think capitalism and democracy are synonymous think that inflation is just some magical thing that when it hits in the future will be easily absorbed.  Squandering money today is no big deal.  That’s why it’s easier for them to dismiss the idea of climate change mega inflation that is already helene here.  I’ll always have a nice job and me and my kids will always have nice jobs and let the peasants worry about unaffordable health care and the price of bacon.  The higher up the food chain you are dollar wise is a lovely buffer towards not caring about the effects of misinformation on the commoner.  Now on to the actual gematria inflation:

Something interesting?  Or just stupid?  What this gematria loving Qanon did was talk about the seven periods after “the Storm is upon us.”

Well sure.  This isn’t about the number 7, it’s about 8 since “obviously” it’s Morse code and “obviously” it was a magic message that the starting point is 7 instead of any other number around the same.  Oh, just a wild a crazy number like 8 periods comes to mind.  Because this makes all kinds of fucking sense.  Let’s see, 8/7…figure it couldn’t have taken more than a day, multiply by 365 that’s annualized to 417%!!!

The swag these people have chosen to show their support is remarkably useless.  It’s way overpriced, they can and do spend way above their means.  And the value they get is being stuck in a negative feedback loop of overspending, complaining, and never improving their lives.  But they still get to vote.  And just because they failed or never had math and science we have to put up with 417% inflation.  And it doesn’t matter who they vote for, they’ll still get to complain about the climate change mega inflation for a long time to come.

The advertisements on social media that rely on the “free speech” arguments are getting worse all the time.  Companies that relied on reputation and making a quality product are getting a squeeze by having to compete with our ever evolving global griftocracy.  No new toaster for you.  You spent $100 on a silver coin to put in your water cup because you saw that add on YouTube.  No field trip for little Darlene.  Daddy needed that $132 for his annual sports Patreon subscription.  Forget about going to college.  No going to the state fair.  The ticket price went up because additional security was hired since that local sovereign citizen leader who advertises on Facebook is a ten minute drive away and they’ve been stirring up trouble, etc…. Or etc……..   or however many fucking …………. is the right number.

And the beauty of the internet is that these ads can originate from anywhere.  It’s hard to imagine having a country that thinks it can operate on a platform of stealing only from other countries, not eating your own.

Just because YOU are smart enough to not fall for scams doesn’t mean others are.  If we’re not allowed to put education in our schools about it, there has to be an alternative that doesn’t have bad information given equal weight to the right answer.  I want a world where seven dots means seven, not eight.  Facts matter.

How To Be Wrong Over 60 Times (Or More)

 

Never have I wanted to see a miserably bad baseball team win one more game of their two remaining than I do now.  The obvious prediction is that the White Sox will lose their last two games and give one of the most memorable baseball gematria narratives in quite some time.  Because as luck of the draw would have it (amidst a data set the size that rivals the number of grains of sand on a beach) two of the most common ciphers have values that just happen to add up to 162.  That’s the number of games in the MLB season.  And it’s really hard, even hard for a really bad team, to lose this many games.

The real baseball statistic junkies have seen the story unfold over the months.  The reason for the losses - the Sox have a comically bad run differential per game.  They’ve scored the fewest runs of all teams over the season and only two teams have allowed more runs.  Over the 160 games they’ve played that’s almost two full runs less a game than their opponents scored.

But factual real life analysis doesn’t suit the conspiracy mentality of gambling on sports with information that is only available after the last out in the ninth inning or the ponies have crossed the finish line.  So they’ve managed to drag in the entirety of the planet into the conspiracy.  Everyone is in on it.  That’s easy to tell just by using gematria where any narrative can be created for any story, quite literally.  It just matters how much effort and cheating you want to do to get it spicy enough for publication.  

And there’s the old fashioned way of getting most of the planet in on the conspiracy.  Starting with the username, the “201” is a dog whistle meaning Jesuit, or more specifically THE JESUIT ORDER = 201.  Any name referring to waking up is taking a shot ant the “normies” who recognize Alex Jones for the bloated bag of fetid waste of oxygen that he is. And combine this with the account retweeting Zach we know it’s a friend, if not an outright sock puppet.  So everyone with a connection to the Jesuits is in on this.  And everyone that plays on the White Sox is certainly in on it.  And to make the final results the perfect alignment over season the other teams are in on it.  And the management, trainers, umpires, and all the families.  And nobody has managed to lose their cool and be the whistleblower who came forward and said after the first loss, “That’s nothing, just wait til ya see what we got planned for this season!”,  <wink wink>.

But my favorite part by far is how these mighty powers managed to be so cosmically inept at this.  The 162 game season started in 1961.  So this is the first time they’ve managed to pull this off in over 60 years.  Gematria as a stand in for fake armchair Nostradamury has managed to be wrong over 60 times since the 162 game schedule started.  And that’s being generous.  The White Sox were established in 1894, so the prediction also claims that the evil powers that want you to give $11 a month to some schmuck planned this out 130 years ago.  And if you predicted it would finally happen in 2024 then that’s a success rate of 0.77%.  Which means you pretty much suck at predictions and should probably stop.  You’re making the gematria community look bad by going off the rails.

I’m being too harsh, for in this case the fact that it’s an already failed prediction is disguised better than most.  To an uninitiated teenager getting their first taste at stealing their parent’s credit card to set up a Draft Kings account it looks good superficially.  Just give them a full NFL season of losses and a 50% prediction rate to wake them up and they’ll be fine as they’ve moved on to bigger and brighter things like being old enough to vote for criminals or getting people killed by interrupting vaccinations.

When Narratives Go Off the Rails

You never know how much longer Twixter is going to last, but for now:

https://x.com/waltermasterson/status/1839424880955232520?s=46&t=wob6xnQtbxqGI-vqY_S2xg

Sarcastic real life trolling without hiding behind a keyboard.  Skipping to the end, after our actor has gone through his prepared material supplemented by the audience presenting him with random parts of speech he culminates with the creation of a new conspiracy:

Guatemalan immigrants are going to steal our birds and set them on fire.

Along the journey (and a sidebar for future searches, this is Maximilian Clark, the video is also on Tik Tok) he points out that some of these people from Haitia [sic] turn out to be decent quality U.S. citizens.  Some of them utilizing social service programs as intended.

So if you’re new here, first of all don’t join my nonexistent Patreon.  That being done, now, you know what the generation of the new conspiracy about bird arson sounds like?

A gematria narrative.  A gematria narrative without the numbers.  Don’t expect the republican leaders to actually talk about immigration policy or combatting inflation when there are elections to be won by stoking fear and hatred by making up some bullshit along the way.

Instead of finding individual <insert migrant demonym> who are committing <insert crime>, which incidentally aren’t a real thing at all, let’s give the cyber bullies ammunition to clog up the internet with more disinformation.  Let’s get that broad brush stroke out and paint the entire <demonym> community with something negative.  Even though you could just as easily choose the opposite narrative to paint your picture.  The beauty of fiction aimed at emotion.  Like that’s never gone wrong before.  And now I’m the bad person, since sarcasm isn’t great for dealing with cognitively biased people, you bastards, look what you made me do.

Just for fun I thought I’d make a new gematria narrative.

Vote for 38 people because 202 98 are hunting 155.

There.  I will totally forgot what semi-random words I threw into a calculator to make that, but with the beauty of insignificant small numbers I’ll just substitute some other words.

The theme is that this stuff makes you look bad.  Darn right, instead of actually being a leader with constructive ideas you’re getting help from the alliance of the online grift community who doesn’t give a hoot beyond capitalizing on the confirmation bias of their target audience.  It makes you looked unhinged, weird and stupid because it is.   And there's somebody else preaching the don’t go off the rails message.

https://youtu.be/61thXj0_cMA?si=TLHbrI1TnxSsajOZ

He wants you to stick to the officially approved cult leader message.  In other words, wait until you get the official Attaboy!^TM before you go off the rails and post something that makes the gematria community look unhinged and weird.  In reality, nothing in a gematria narrative can be viewed as anything but unhinged and weird.  The entire point is clickbait to get sports pick subscribers, donations for fake methods to invest in cryptocurrency, or even drum up a little hatred for votes.

True leadership would be denouncing the unhinged and weird narratives, not promoting it.  Joining that team, well, you get what you paid for.

Weather Griftfare

 

That’s the brand new FG-13 fighter jet.  F=6, G=7.  So that’s the 13-13 fighter jet.  It is made mostly of aluminum, element number 13 on the periodic table which is also called aluminium if you want to phraseshop for alternative gematria values.  It runs on carbon (element 6) and nitrogen (element 7) for your additional 13.  It was designed to for use by the 🇺🇸 to bomb the shit out of non 🇺🇸 countries that dare to use the word aluminium instead of aluminum like proper North American English.

———————————————————————-

Watching climate change and the associated grift playing out in real time over the span of my lifetime has not exactly been a lot of fun.  I admit to basing some long term decision based on passing away before the worst of it hits.  I guess that’s been mostly true, but the hidden costs are now becoming more exposed extremely often.

Climate science was not a thing.  And now that we still have a SCIENCE = BAD mentality it translates into GRIFT = GOOD.  There’s only one science topic the conservatives have held up as good science, and that’s military technology.  You’d better believe my thoughts on traditional values are good because my science education gun is bigger than yours.

The FG (Fucking Gematria)-13 has onboard computer systems driven by inflation.  Now that the cat is out of the bag about how climate change is a real thing the politicians who rely on traditional values for votes and not education that supports reality are left arguing about inflation.  And boy are they good at it.  The cuts displayed on the FG-13 are actually related to the costs of inflation to keep the air force flying and keeping the debt at a believable level.

So, little Timmy, let me explain one piece of the FG-13 today.  The Aid to Cities cuts.  Because weather warfare is the only thing that the FG-13 isn’t equipped to handle.  Sure lots of other parts are involved, but focus Timmy - just the weather for today.

There’s another big hurricane smashing into Florida today, Helene.  But free speech and promotion of bad and blatantly wrong information is more important than the causes.  Yes, we would have hurricanes anyway.  But they wouldn’t be this bad.  A hurricane doesn’t need to make humans go extinct.  It just needs to be worse than normal to affect the onboard inflation powered systems to have the negative impact.  Decades of climate change = warmer water = nastier hurricanes.  Free speech = fossil fuel lobbyists = GOP votes = incompetence like a Trump or DeSantis.

Weather warfare is not a real thing, but the grift economy loves it.  You can do bullshit gematria numbers on it.  You can do a flat earth narrative.  You can get uneducated morons pointing their phone at the sky and complaining about chemtrails.  Or aliens.  And these always come from social media accounts that inevitably support conservative talking points.  And when the innocent bystanders have their lives interrupted the government steps in to help it costs more.  And the feedback loop gets them complaining about the price of gas and eggs framed as “liberal wokeness” instead of the wheels set in motion long ago.  Whoever is President come November really doesn’t have much impact on the decades old cycle of corporate profits, massive insurance company executive bonuses, etc… because we didn’t just not turn off the real kettle, we decided the water wasn’t hot enough and threw more fuel under the fire.

This is as far as the armchair constitutional law experts go —> Free speech good.  Guns and planes —> Really fucking good.  Inflation —> What?!?  That’s bad, the left must have done it.

So Timmy, put on your flak jacket, forget about having a chance of eating lunch today*, go to school and don’t study any science today.  There are lots of other jet parts to go over here later.

* You could beat up little Gerald for his lunch money again.  He’s got the wrong color skin and I hear his Mom is an atheist.  There’s like no chance he’ll be bitter about it and fight back.

The Blue Ruins of Infowars

NPR - Alex Jones story

Only $8 million instead of $1.5 billion?!?  What?  Where is the justice?

For the not clicking on links inclined, here’s the recap.  Alex was hit with a whopping $1.5 billion dollar judgment.  He played the delaying game as long as possible.  The court initially was looking at letting him keep in business to earn more to pay out more OR selling off his actual real property and try to stop him from being the parasite he is.  In that case, the payout is quoted as less than $8 million instead of $1.5 billion.  That’s about half a percent of the initial judgment.

And now for the odd post title.

Facebook’s algorithm decided I needed a video about the movie Blue Ruin.  It does look interesting enough for a look and it’s my analogy for the Jones judgment story.  In BR, the hero is an ordinary guy.  And as fate would have it he’s put in a situation where he is supposed to go John Wick on bad guys and kill them.  But, he’s an ordinary guy.  He doesn’t know how to shoot straight, stitch up his own wounds with a sewing needle and thread, survive nearby explosions, ricochet a bullet off the pavement to nail the baddie hiding behind the car, or anything remotely highly trained movie assassin bolstered with plot armor.

Sadly, the idea that $1.5 billion would ever see a switch of hands and bank accounts was pretty ridiculous.  That’s the kind of thing that only happens in a movie.  It’s extremely unlikely that Free Speech Systems would ever generate enough to pay off anything close to $1.5 billion.  More likely, in real world law instead of movie law it’s a message for future Alex’s that there’s a precedent for totally bankrupting future similar shenanigans.  Or even current shenanigans instead of future.  And add to the real world mix, in the current atmosphere of people questioning the partisan ethics accusations levied at the Supreme Court we’re also looking at maybe $0 or a Trump term including a full pardon also leading to a $0.

There are movies that touch on real world law, like A Civil Action (Travolta, Shaloub, Macy, Gandolfini, Duvall) that’s based on a real non-fiction book where things don’t turn out well for the lawyers.  It’s still entertaining, but arguably not as much as the unrealistic drama of A Few Good Men or Rob tickling of My Cousin Vinny.

The courts do not need to settle for an ordinary Blue Ruin legal resolution.  We already know that gematria is undeniable (as they often remind us) and that nothing is a coincidence (as they often remind us) and it’s the bestest proof out there.  Once it gets to the point of an appeal there is a simple fact that needs to be emphasized that oversees the rule of law.  In addition to being a football fan, one of the top deities has ordained that Infowars is evil:

Case closed.  Suck it Travolta.  I’m a better movie lawyer than you.

The Bone Peddlers: Examining A Case of Interrupting Education

Here’s a weird one for you.  There’s a book titled The Bone Peddlers: Selling Evolution, authored by William R. Fix.  The theory he created is gematria approved in quality, or rather lack of quality is described.  Psychogenesis - instead of being born mortal, dying, and then becoming a spirit it’s the other way around.  Spirits (I have no idea of where from or how they came to be), floated around and created matter and bodies.

So, basically it’s a rather odd and refreshingly different form of some kind of kooky idea that was created to have fun and make a buck.  But, never let an opportunity to capitalize on crank magnetism go unused.  Creationists started quoting the book as proof that Darwin’s Theory of Evolution was wrong.   And this discussion is so important it made its way to the:

Kansas wrestling team.

https://www.usawks.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=185609&page=1

February 2011, a forum created allegedly for wrestling topics turns into a philosophical debate without the booze, weed, and dingy & messy dorm room associated with college student debating.

I find the second entry to be particularly offensive although scientifically I’m on the same side of the argument.  This is what we call plagiarism.  Copied word for word from a review of The Bone Peddlers

https://www.talkorigins.org/faqs/homs/bonepeddlers.html

Even a cursory glance through the first entries on the Kansas wrestling forum shows how it quickly becomes focused on religion vs. science, specifically Noah’s Ark.  And this is the kind of thing that happens with political messaging on social media all the time.  Side A has an argument with little or no empirical evidence.  Side B presents peer reviewed high quality evidence.  And the fun begins with all the doubling down, confirmation bias, and mental gymnastics.

And it’s all started by the person who acts as the proxy for our internet grifter.  Our Chief Renegade troll claims that here’s a secular person debunking evolution!  Give me your attention!!

And it works.  The “debate” lasted over a month.  Finally as it peters out there’s a “I got the last word, I win” message from the original poster not talking anything wrestling related.

The entire thing reads like a conspiracy theory discussion.  Start off with something relatively bonkers that shouldn’t be taken seriously.  (At least it wasn’t gematria!)  Troll a group to get them talking about it.  Then finish up with a completely incorrect conclusion about your victory while asserting your source is the ONLY OBJECTIVE EVIDENCE.

Nope.  Bacteria - Lenski.  Big flood - too many things wrong to recount here.  And very little discussion about the thread topic.

Stolen Valor

 

I doubt Hubbard is actually taking credit for inventing the gematria calculator.  His GEN site has “a” calculator.

https://gematriaeffect.news/gematria-calculator/

But when people refer to “the” calculator it is usually the Gematrinator calculator that is being referenced.  And there are others out there, doing the same basic thing which is changing the alphabet into numbers to simplify the process so you wouldn’t have to use a handheld calculator or paper and pencil.

Important intellectual property is jealously guarded with lawsuits for infringement being the go to recourse.  And the odds that Derek or Zach will even bother correcting this goof are pretty slim, much less hiring a lawyer to sort through who did what and has what rights and what damages are  to be awarded.

Stolen valor has been in the election news recently as JD Vance has taken public potshots at Walz’s military record.

https://www.npr.org/2024/08/08/nx-s1-5068668/vance-walz-stolen-valor-military-record

But actually, this isn’t about either taking credit for calculator creation or VP nominee military service records.  It’s about the Letters and Numbers book itself.  And the old story covered here long ago when it was first being written.  Zach took credit for reviews that are clearly not genuine.  And the old posts here have the receipts - the screenshots that prove it.

It went down something like this.  Before completely solidifying himself as the top name associated with sports gematria on social media Zach put in a lot of effort into shameless self marketing.  When the idea to invest effort into a book came up he turned it into an interactive experience.  The at that time current group of clueless decoders (long gone now) were asked to throw in their input into cover designs and content.  So updating them, Zach would offer preliminary drafts to see what was looking good.  Like filming alternate endings for test audiences.

The “draft” product of the book was displayed.  Complete with reviews on the cover.  Glowing reviews talking about the life altering material within the pages.  Glowing reviews before the book was ever published or released.

I will have to check sometime to find out if it is the exact same reviews as displayed on this tweet from yesterday.  Regardless of the outcome of that, it takes a lot of balls to blatantly lie about nonexistent reviews on a book that talks about media lies right above it in the cover.

And although that information has been available here for a long time, people still miss out and gamble off his pay to play sports prediction.

The stolen valor is the age old copying of what worked for other grifters in the past.

Meanwhile, Back At the BlueAnonCave

 

At least I think the source I pulled this off Twixter qualifies as BlueAnon.  It’s hard to tell since I didn’t find any obvious grifting link.  That’s usually a tell tale sign of what the purpose is.

But, since gematria is completely worthless as evidence it provides a clear example of someone who is more than willing to spend some time on turning Trump into the bad guy.  And whether he is or is not has nothing to do with the number 67.  There is a number that will appear in Jack Smith’s revised document retention case, and it’s 0.  That’s the number of times gematria will appear as supporting evidence.

So running through what I can see at what qualifies as merely a cursory glance.  Starting with the image, well despite years of being force fed Qanon style cockwomble ranting about Obama being the Antichrist here it’s Donald.  And there’s lots more of that throughout the other content.  That’s how easy it is to make up bullshit with gematria.  Filling out the outrage porn quality evidence instead of real evidence we have some caricature images.  Somebody who likes making political cartoons must be involved.  Instead of relying on photoshop it’s easy to make a character sneer in evil glee in a cartoon image.  And notice, no gematria decode is complete without a mention of human sacrifice.  Any sacrificing going on is the old fashioned way, not by a magic based ritual.

Now on to the other content.  I did purposefully shave off the top and bottom, so if you want to find the sources other links you’ve got to look for it yourself.  No need to boost it anymore.  The account is allegedly from South Korea.  They have lots of anti rich elites content.  Standard anti NWO/Illuminati/Freemasons stuff.  Pro flat earth and definitely identifies as Christian.  Anti Vaxx.

And with Don being at the top of the food chain, you’re going to need a good pop culture reference to really sell the outrage porn.  And the predictive programming choice is <drum roll>

Bane from The Dark Night Rises.  Because the kiddies need a source they’ve heard of instead of Middle Eastern actual people’s names.

Fortunately the account doesn’t have a lot of followers.  Within who it follows is the Gematria Club Twixter account that is involved with some of the same accounts Hubbard is.  And it follows some Middle Eastern media accounts and Jackson Hinkle.  So it’s either someone keeping tabs on the enemy or someone very, very confused about what they believe in as their core message.

I’m not going to waste a lot more of time on it for now.  Let’s just leave it as worth a watch to see if it starts popping up on the radar more in the future.  It’s obviously deeply unserious just based on doing gematria alone, and its existence is just to grab attention for some unknown to me purpose.  Within the internet grifter economy, there is no niche that won’t be filled.

35 Thursday

“Learn gematria and you’ll see this code repeated every day.”

An often used phrase or some variation you will hear from your chosen gematria cult leader frequently .  The implication is that the evil forces that don’t allow you to simply sit down and enjoy a game for the sake of entertainment are mocking you with these hidden rituals.  And once you figure out how to find these hidden ritual scripted events you will enjoy wealth beyond the dreams of avarice.  The reality is, once you focus on some tiny numbers it’s impossible not to find that tiny number.  But marketing a particular number, at least short term, gives your newcomers something to do.  Get them looking for some numbers they can’t help but find, then let their own brains convince them that it was hard work, and that this qualifies as real evidence.

I heard Zach finally give an endorsement of the Composite Number Cipher.  So let's go for a quick recap.  Rewinding way back to a time when gematria was mostly a fake sports prediction scam and Qanonsense hadn’t taken hold, Derek created the Gematrinator calculator.  No more fussing around with a standard calculator or pen and paper.  And that’s when adding ciphers other than the four basic ones was “cool”.  Making things easier for those you want to scam is always cool.  And to this day, the Primes and Reverse Primes ciphers are a feature on the online calculator.  So one day, someone else (Zenith) thought, you know, we haven’t had a good new cipher for a while.  Something to keep the newbies busy typing away.  And composite numbers are the numbers that aren’t primes.  That sounds good.  So let’s just ignore that history doesn’t show any occult leader declaring that they were searching for new cheats.  Bingo Composite Cipher is born.

But we aren’t quite through the process.  Even though the calculator has an option (if you pay for a membership) to make a customized cipher which can literally and obviously force any number you want, it needs to be vetted.  A sort of baptism where if the big names don’t give it a stamp of approval then it’s not cool to use it, even if only occasionally.

At times these big names veer off in idealogy.  Nothing major like one ever admitting to some of the big problems like reverse engineering after the game is over or, well, creating a customizable cipher to force any result you want.  And they like to fake fight occasionally about stuff.  Any engagement is good engagement in weirdo world.  It keeps the newbies busy typing away and painting bullseyes on themselves - you like Derek and his astronomy, synchronicity mish mash and a butt ton of ciphers - crypto might be the right fit for you.  Zach and emphasis on just four base ciphers, well that can end up almost anywhere because he’s all over the place.  The bottom line is, some of the odder and newer ciphers have survived the test of time and are still kickin’.

And Zach has finally acknowledged the existence of the Composite cipher and didn’t say, yet, “That’s the stupidest thing ever.”  Attaboys! have been disseminated.

Finally, we are at 35 Thursday.  THURSDAY=35 in the reduction cipher.  And there’s NFL football on Thursday night.  So instead of doing your algebra homework, family board game night or sleeping you’re supposed to be watching the NFL game and looking for the 35’s that appear.  Because the evil empire is so busy mocking you they hide 35’s JUST on Thursday night football.  Because the cult leader said so.  More engagement, more chance that those who haven’t had their wallet emptied out yet and their interest waning a chance to pop into the comments and state that they indeed were smart enough to find a 35.  Thursday night is not for finding 666 or 47 or 56 or other overused numbers.  It’s 35 Thursday.  Because even though you’ll find 35’s in abundance every day the proclamation has been set forth.  You can eat tacos on a day that’s not Tuesday, but your glorious leader has set the record straight.

Well, what day of the week has the most NFL action?  That’s not a trick question.  It’s Sunday.  And at around the same time we got the Primes ciphers we got another one.  Sorry if my talking about composites led you astray, it’s not about that.  The background was to illustrate the birthing process of ciphers beyond a single one which might actually make some sense.  We’re talking about the Keypad cipher.

You could be looking for 35 on Sunday.  Except you haven’t been instructed to.  Based on the system 35 should be just as magical on Sunday as on Thursday night.  But sports gematria doesn’t work that way.  First of all, focusing newbies on 35 on Sunday would make the figure out faster that multiple 35’s show up every single week for both teams.  Just like it’s super easy to find something like Sunday having matching gematria with Thursday they’ll get bombarded with 35 and some will figure it out early, maybe even posting comments about it.  (Zach hates that and will call you a troll.  You’ll get the “discernment” lecture). Also, Zach does put significant effort into his narratives for the Sunday games.  These utilize a lot of less frequently used numbers, numbers with more plausible deniability when the narrative shows up for both teams.  He needs that instead of people figuring out that both teams have 35’s every week.  Because if you see those Sunday narratives, you’re already paying for a Patreon subscription.

Just for the record, Saturday (college football) has a 53.  It hasn’t happened much lately, but this “mirror image” fake match trick is still used.  So technically it’s also 35 Saturday and 35 Sunday and 35 Thursday.

“Learn repeating numbers every day and you will see repeated numbers every day.”

There’s no code.  35 has gematria existence everyday.  And so do all the other two digit and most three digit numbers.  It just matters if you’re a good little brainwashed wallet emptied puppet or not to admit it on social media.

Know Your Grifter Debate Tactics - The Gish Gallop

Yes, it’s been covered before, but it’s extremely relevant now.

Gematria is perfectly designed for this phony tactic.  There’s not any credibility to the underlying arguments, and the goal is to bombard the opposition with an overwhelming number of talking points.  By the time a legitimate debate opposition has countered a single point, like a hydra another dozen heads has appeared.  

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gish_gallop

Zach is really good at this.  An ordinary video with Zach alone in his studio or car doesn’t lend itself to this, but a livestream complete with critics (those he deems trolls) gives him his fix.  As soon as someone shows the warning signs of being on to the many valid arguments it’s off to the races.  Changing the subject before there’s even a chance to say, “Don’t change the subject.”

Lately there’s been some supplemental “debates” going on where he’ll invade another YouTuber’s turf and try and drum up curious newbies to visit his content.  Within his lifetime of gematria work, everything looked at as a whole is a giant Gish gallop.  One day 47 means this, a month later it means that.  There’s no mention of why his gematria overlaps the Jesuits.  There’s no explanation on why it’s supposed to be so magical at predicting but only works after the box scores in the books.  It must be kind of boring to spout disinformation on a daily basis, so arguing with someone - that’s good for views.  People love angry Zach more than the nonexistent Teach Me To Win Money At Gambling Zach.

And you know who else likes to change the subject and ramble incoherently in front of crowd that loves anger more than facts?

https://youtu.be/RUSwo17WQmw?si=HO5hdNdh8g7HjDfy

Donald.  Terrible in a formal debate setting.  Terrible at rallies, too.  But that’s a friendly audience not out looking for trouble.  They paid money to watch their hero ramble incoherently and get what they paid for.

At the end of the video Mother Jones mentions a tactic to help you if you’re doing actual research instead of just blindly worshiping a grifter.  Read the transcript.  It will force you to slow down and identify the many single talking points that have already been documented as lies.  Needless to say, lying about something else to cover up a previous lie doesn’t have any real logical and factual value.

I’d like to add another tip to that if you want to do actual research.  Look at the comments sections of the YouTube videos.  The Attaboy!^TM and the Gish gallop material quality are incompatible.  He needs to balance the nothing is too crazy to be dismissed of the former with the inconsistent overall message of the latter.  All he needs is for you to believe today that it’s good enough for a paid subscription, and months from now he’ll be working on a new crop of initiates.

A real life example of the same applies to the content I’m seeing about AI now.  These people were trained to find weird shit in the clouds like alien ships and chemtrails.  Now they’re being force fed AI topics.  The comments mirror the inconsistency of the video author.  It’s aliens.  It’s shapeshifters.  It’s AI.  It’s holograms.  It’s robots.  It’s CGI.  It’s clones.  It’s people wearing masks.  For crying out loud people, a shapeshifting alien reptilian wearing a mask makes a lot less sense than any single one of those.

And those people are being told to vote for Trump, and they will because that’s what they’ve been groomed and trained to do.  There’s no hint of questioning about women’s health care or immigration of foreign aid or any other real debatable topic.  It’s all just rambling on mindlessly by people with their own internal Gish gallop running through their confirmation bias addled brains.

What If There Was an Actual Gematria Town?

We will never know, so it’s a flimsy excuse to speculate wildly.  That will be fun for me.

So starting off with a fairly lengthy discussion about things that we know that don’t work.  Beginning with civil war, specifically the U.S. Civil War.

One of the more consistently annoying bullshit arguments is the “it was about State’s rights, not slavery!” crap.  Yeah, genius.  Get ready to hear that one often by armchair constitutional “experts” and grifters on social media. States wanted the right to keep slaves, other states, not so much.  And we painted ourselves into a corner with the Declaration of Independence about how we didn’t want to be slaves to Britain.  With the abundance of industry it seemed natural that the raw numbers favored the North.  The South was left with a vague ideal - decentralization and business as what had been normal - slaves.  And wow, no gematria to make artificial scapegoats.  Ideals don’t win battles by themselves.

And that’s our segue to libertarians.  Their most consistently annoying ideal is not paying taxes.  A perfect target concept for grifter operations.  Lack of a functional government, like a polarized divided country in civil war, does not work.  And thanks to some actual libertarians who put their money where their mouths were, we know how it doesn’t work.  It’s been actually tried:

https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/21534416/free-state-project-new-hampshire-libertarians-matthew-hongoltz-hetling

And major kudos for the title, “A Libertarian Walks Into a Bear”.  Pure genius.

My take on libertarians - some good ideas, but totally impractical to implement in reality.  They care more about economics than democracy and think they are the same thing.  And nobody wants to do the not glamorous dirty work, so unwanted bears are a pretty hilarious outcome to the Grafton experiment.  

Now that part about economics over democracy - that’s a lot like the way the modern GOP operates today.  The top politicians are obviously making overtures to keep the wealthy few in power and the poor and miserable, well let them find jobs collecting trash and trapping unwanted bears. 

Hostage taker:  I want a million dollars cash, a getaway car, and I want the letter M stricken from the English language.

 It’s the Steve Martin plan - ask for more than you can possibly achieve and maybe the people who actually work at keeping the government functioning will throw you a bone in a compromise where you really deserve nothing.  The Republicans call this Project 2025.  (If you want another example, think Japan bombing Pearl Harbor hoping the U.S. would compromise for an early end on a war they pretty much knew they couldn’t win.

If you’ve made it this far, it’s time to answer your question, “What does this have to do with gematria?”

U.S.  - Slavery bad.  Except when we do it.  Let’s go all in on our scapegoat, and just kinda sweep it under the rug that we do it, too.

Libertarians - Perfectly happy with talking big and relying on the government we hate because of taxes giving us roads and disaster relief and long range bombers.

And lots of people who grow up with some decent education see the problems that exist that nothing gets done about.  And the anti government rhetoric is a grifter gold mine which since its theft adds no economic value.  Taking other people’s stuff does not produce new stuff.  (That is one of the good libertarian talking points, but the bears don’t cooperate.)

I’ve seen enough gematria videos over the years that this idea of making a physical community comes up now and then.  And it’s been tried, only as a sidebar to an online community.  The online community being a planning stage for collecting like minded “truthers” to form a commune that is a blatant grift.  Even the online communities collapse rapidly, because “winning the war” was never the attention.  I hate the government does not win battles by itself.

Imagine a town with representation of an ideal that admits to including X= bad scapegoat and also simultaneously X = the promoters of the idea that there is a bad scapegoat.  Literally, by their system they are part of the problem group.  You’re not even going to get to the stage where bears become a problem.  The first sign of a flood or wildfire or increase in violent crime is going to result in a cry for help from the government you hate so much.

Gematria is a symptom of the underlying attitudes of society at large.  An expression of hatred and emotion with no value to solutions.  The perfect conspiracy theory light talking point so the less than capable of true intellectual thought get the chance to be angry.  And then after enough brainwashing, gaslighting and indoctrination this spills over into real life situations with natural disasters, road rage and actual bears instead of just a two digit number representing bears.

The Gematria Choose Your Own Adventure Book

Published by Really, Really, Really Random House Books

Burples and his friends are at the entrance to the haunted house, and the door is locked with a rusty chain and padlock.  As the gematria leader of the group do you, the mighty Burples does which?

1). 105  go to page 43

2).  113  go to page 64

3).  280  go to page 17

4).  154 go to page 59

Page 43

Burples decides to BREAK THE CHAIN = 105.  The angry spirits inside the house are agitated.  Their leader, a former powerful witch skilled in gematria chooses to interpret BREAK THE CHAIN as “break the chain of command” and promotes the incompetent nitwit Doofie to be the new leader.  Doofie decides to pick 63.  Go to page 59.

Page 64

Burples decides to PICK THE LOCK = 113. This is the number of dishonesty, DISHONEST = 113.  Yet, in the Caps added cipher Truth = 113 and in ordinal VERACIOUS = 113, etc…. The lock refuses to budge.  Go to page 59.

Page 17

Burples uses his ability of breaking the rules to choose ENTER THROUGH THE WINDOW = 280.  Nobody said anything about any fucking window.  The angry spirits swarm from inside the haunted house and dismember the group in a hideous manner.  But this was just a bad dream, a false image.  You have now learned that it’s not ok to be wrong, but you’re not very bright.  A fact obvious because you’re trying to use gematria to enter a haunted house instead of something more productive.  Go to page 59.

Page 59

Why exactly are you here?  Did you get redirected from another choice or did you pick option 4 on the first page?  I mean, seriously, it’s like you’re dead set on reaching this page and what your expectations truly are is a mystery.  154 could mean STAY ON PORCH.  After the window fiasco you shouldn’t try that again. Is there really a porch here?  You could STAY ON THE PORCH.  Or THIS porch.  Or the stoop.  STAY HERE.  Maybe instead of just staying here jerking off and fiddling around with meaningless numbers that could mean anything you should go to page 92.

Page 92

Hint book for sale - $5,999 and being the laughingstock of your school and the disapproval of your family and former friends.

——————————————————————-

There are games that follow the same basic rules that get more difficult as you solve the puzzles.  Tetris gets faster.  Legend of Zelda has tougher monsters later.  And there are well thought out computer games like the old LucasArts games (Monkey Island, Indiana Jones) where there is one correct final solution, but you can make some personal choices along the way that alter the story a bit.  But there is only one final solution.

The gematria game has no ending.  You can go to a Trump rally or buy into a sports betting Patreon, but you’ll never get to the point where you get off the porch and inside the haunted house.  The best approach is to consider why you even want to be in the haunted house in the first place.  That, followed closely by how much time it takes you to realize that you’re predicting that there’s an ending or final solution that requires staying on the porch for an infinite amount of time.

The gematria adventure also drags down the quality of life of others around you.  The useless Trump swag is pricey.  The gambling profits are nonexistent and require lying your way through the chat to avoid embarrassment, and it’s a safe bet if you’re invested in gematria topics you are less likely to have a decent job.  Heck, there are gematria gurus that literally beg for money every few weeks with content that amounts to “stay on the porch for more depression”.  It’s not just the direct money.  It’s a huge waste of TIME.

Get off the porch, now.

“Super” Foods

Superscam

Finding employment is tough.  A job is not the problem, a decent job that pays a fair wage for a fair amount of output and hours of effort, that’s the real problem.  In the workplace part of the pyramid scheme format, you can pretty easily tell if you’re in a gung ho right wing job if you get:

Free coffee.  And a turkey at Christmas time.  But mostly the coffee.  Colonialism and empires fueled on the magic and fully normalized use of a drug.  And make no mistake, caffeine is a drug.  Maybe we shouldn’t elevate it as a golden elixir so much, but it’s too ingrained into culture that getting rid of it entirely is out of the question.

Like nicotine a caffeine laden plant gets protection from herbivores, so it’s a natural choice for humans to express their defiance.  I am cool, because I can do this drug that is slowly causing problems.

If you want to play the office politics game succesfully there’s two top tips.  Don’t get involved with someone doing gematria.  At least we’re at a point now that it’s just silly and weird.  Finding a coworker who has a kid that does gematria a lot, that’s tougher to sleuth out.  They’re likely getting flak for not being a good parent (face it, they’re a Karen) and will push back endlessly on acting in a self destructive manner.  The better tip - find the person that drinks their coffee the most arrogantly and latch on and ride those coattails to success.

Caffeine is high in antioxidants, and technically fits the definition of a superfood as well as a psychoactive drug.  It’s really uncool at your right wing job to mention either.  It’s so normalized it’s not exotic enough for superfood status.  But it’s largely unrecognized role is the gateway.  And that’s not the gateway drug gateway, it’s the arrogance gateway.  A liberal lower middle class office employee will drink McDonalds coffee from a styrofoam cup.  A right wing fresh out of college graduate hired from nepotism to be a future executive, their drinking coffee is an art form.  Standing up, ceramic mug embraced by both hands with their Keurig cup sourced caffeine fix.  Spending more time showing off their coolness than actually consuming the beverage.

The effect on the lower classes spreads across the entire spectrum.  Some will continue McDonalds styrofoam based consumption.  Some will work their way up to Starbucks.  And some will embrace the office culture completely.  You’re not cool if you don’t latch on to your own favorite K Cup blend and spend time campaigning for its place beside the brew pot.

Your arrogant coffee drinker will also embrace the entire superfood concept.  Being willing to absorb lots of student loan debt and a hefty mortgage requires a superiority complex that’s through the roof.  Executive material through and through, doing anything in the office politics game to get to the top.  The kind of person that makes the styrofoam cup crowd cry out, “What the fuck does she actually do?!?”  And if you dare interrupt her diatribe on the benefits of quinoa and goji berries you can expect the claws to come out.

In the period of time before the actual promotion to non productive vice president, you can see that this superfood loving person is bad news by the reaction of upper management.  They will do nothing because they’re too busy playing golf, taking vacations and doing anything resembling managing Karen the arrogant coffee drinking toxic narcissist.  A few of them will not realize it, but it’s probably within the pages of Project 2025 somewhere.  “I’m making far too much money sitting on my passive income stream to care about my employees.  The only time I wish to invest is pretending I care and figuring out how many turkeys I can give away at the holidays without ruining my multi million dollar executive bonus.”

And this is where gematria type topics enter into our story.  Inept and corrupt management spends an inordinate amount of time pretending they care and knowing full well that long term the house of cards is going to crumble.  But why bother caring about their employee’s children getting a decent education when one has passed on beyond the mortal coffee drinking vale?  That’s not my problem.  Selling out the future of the children is not my concern.  I’m certainly not going to call out my political party’s embrace of utter stupidity.  Immigrants eating pets, getting votes from gematria using gun toting rednecks, and dismissing the antics of someone like a George Santos who clearly had no business drinking coffee in my office.

What our Karen has learned is the high level art of scapegoating and blame shifting.  Spending money on others - bad.  Unless I can use it as a political stunt short term.  My fortune is going towards donations to government leaders for really important topics.  Things like the massive inflation from climate change that we can blame on libtards by talking about gas prices today and ignoring how fossil fuel industry $ and attack on science got us where we are today.  Now that’s something worthy of my resources.

A shame that the golf and skiing thing isn’t really going to go well.  So drill baby, drill.  Drill deep down and keep looking for a new source of caffeine and other superfoods or something else you can label (incorrectly) as a solution to your terrible ideas on economics and capitalism.  A world view that only works with unlimited resources and no waste by products.  If you do that arrogantly enough, NOBODY will ever figure it out.

Another Warning About Overcompensation

One of the stories circulating in my conspiracy theory critic group is how annoying BlueAnon is with “staged assassination attempt” content, correctly identifying it as just as bad as the more common right wing extremism content.  That being every mass shooting is instantly labeled as a false flag.  An attempt to enact legislation to take away your guns.  Since this is a bad time to mock, that’s exactly why I’m going to do it.  It’s payback time.

Given my activity, my knowledge of how sometimes the most batshit crazy stuff gets posted without a trace of comic intent I find this amusing.  I in turn saw this post on Twixter a bit later:

I could have devoted my Twixter life to turning this into a variation of the same joke, which I also would find amusing.  “You believe space is a hoax but 187 is real?!?  WTF!  The Freemasons got rid of 187 over 200 years ago, your math is all wrong.”

If you’re here, there is context in abundance and it’s an obviously lame attempt at humor.  But repeated over and over and over, maybe spiced up with some new mean memes, it loses any comic value and just becomes annoying.  There’s no value if the intent is to be a form of intellectual argument.

Which is what the modern GOP has relied on for decades.  And it’s turned into if you wear MAGA caps or have a Trump bumper sticker it’s now a bullseye for payback.  Where I live the pro Harris signs are appearing in yards, and I only know two people openly gung ho Trump.  And I am in a 2/3rds to 1/3rd red area.  The red people appear to be supportive of Republicans for financial reasons instead of ideological reasons.

Regardless of the results of a highly divisive event, no matter where you are you still need to live with these people.  You still want to go to breakfast with these people in the same building.  You don’t want to invoke a road rage incident with the other side.  You still have to cooperate with them.

I found the Let’s Go Brandon content to be childish and not funny.  And it still gets airtime and is not funny.  But gentle mocking is not a deal breaker.  Something like the bomb threats in Springfield, that’s a deal breaker.  That’s a line that shouldn’t be crossed.  Support of somebody so consistently destructive to the same people that support him makes absolutely no sense.  It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye because the eye surgery ward was shut down from a bomb threat.

Here’s hoping the blue people can get the mocking out of their system now and shake hands and walk away a couple months from now.  There’s a bunch of people that are going to be pissed off regardless of the outcome.

Way To Go, Weirdos

Just like pushing Ivermectin which did nothing to help the Covid pandemic response, right wing baseless conspiracy affects the life, liberty and pursuit of happiness of a lot of innocent people.

https://amp.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/sep/14/more-bomb-threats-hit-springfield-ohio-after-trump-elevates-false-claims-about-haitians

There might not be any gematria behind that story, not have I seen any gematria oriented posts on Twixter.  So let me be the one to put out that narrative.  Because I’m one of the few people that will give you the real story.  I rarely post on Twixter, being content to watch it crash and burn.  Others are more active than me and view the site hopefully - assuming it’s redeemable or at least a decent tool to get us through the current election cycle.

Your scapegoat is Haitian immigrants.  Your financial hook is the power of the Presidential office, and you the lowly foot soldier will be rewarded for your loyal support.  Somehow.  Maybe.  Like I guess the Grifter in chief is going to make government appointees out of January 6th rioters, evangelical doom and gloom preachers, and the hardcore Qanon shit posters.

Some jobs require a degree of empathy to be truly effective.  And this one hits two of the biggest targets.  Health care and law enforcement.  Instead of treating patients with legitimate non political issues uninterrupted, resources are wasted for a police response to a situation that never should have happened.  If one of my relatives or friend had to be involved, I’d be pissed.  I know this because it pisses me off without one of my relatives or friends being directly involved because I do have some empathy.

Bomb threats interrupted my high school education a couple times.  An undeserved teacher suspension for talking about science in <gasp> Advanced Biology interrupted my high school education.  A lame pandemic response interrupted my employment.  Because intellectually devoid people of the ilk that think bomb threats are fun want to vote for someone clearly incapable of handling the job.  Someone so obviously taking advantage of creating the turmoil he should be working at stopping.  Someone that doesn’t mind that there are supporters that are using a system of numerology and spirituality that ultimately ends up interrupting their lives more than benefitting their lives.

Old School Sports Decoding

And speaking of the psychology of gematria, right on cue we get the grift in action with a side helping of harassment.

Things might not be so bad if the projection was limited to how great a person one is for being a genius decoder.  The temptation to project oneself as a badass keyboard warrior is too great.  There’s no reason to decode sports for fun.  Nobody is sitting down doing it for fun.  Sports gematria, the most common subset of conspiracy gematria, is all about joining a Patreon and comparing notes for gambling.  And naturally this bunkweasel has a Patreon for others to join, not announcing he’s a proud member of the club created by someone else.  Odds are there’s a good chance that as the account is less than a year old it’s recycled from a previous anonymous pretend tough guy badass who made too many wrong picks and decided to start fresh before the historical 50% on predictions caught up with him.

When one is starting off, whether a true first beginning or starting over, you need to market yourself as something special.  And with the association with baseless conspiracies the marketing plan is to be as annoying, arrogant and brash as possible.  If you are gambling without gematria decoding you are not just unlucky to not see the light.  You aren’t just misguided.  You are a tard.  You are less than human.  If I can’t successfully project myself as awesome then I can still make you feel less intelligent, less capable, less human by resorting to childish ad hominem.

It’s the kind of thing that shouldn’t work, but it does.  In 9/11 I saw a video of some bloated human megaphone mouthing off at Wal-Mart, and the customers all showed remarkable restraint and ignored him.  Good for them.  But the miracle of social media and internet grift allows that first time encounter to plant a seed.  Whereas the Wal-Mart shoppers have the opportunity to go home and not be subjugated to more verbal assault, this post will stay up on Twixter.  A long term cheap advertisement that denies the reality of the situation.  Sports gematria decoding is, was, and ever will be useful only for grift.  And the fence sitters, the newbies getting curious talk to the last person they should for information - the person that cares nothing about them except the potential to add them to the monthly Patreon money suckage.  And if your an employer, ask yourself whether you really want to deal with someone who wants to call other people tards when those tards just want to get through their needed Wal-Mart shopping without being harassed.  The one acting out with childish insults is obviously the problem.

Let’s back up and talk about the actual gematria.  It’s a fake prediction.  It may have been pre planned a little.  Some numbers too tempting to talk about.  Likelier it was thrown together ignoring the problems it presents.  83 wins is a common number of victories, and the Orioles certainly did not have 83 wins with an 83 run differential every time in their history.  Far more misses than hits.  It would make more sense if the Orioles gematria was 83 instead of their opponent.  It took me about 45 seconds of random typing to find that COLORADO = 83.  83 and the Tigers isn’t so special after all.

And of course it was reverse engineered ignoring all the many things that don’t make sense.

But the person that’s not aware, who isn’t prepared with the critical thinking tools to dismiss it, seeing it for the first time, it looks good.  And they’re maybe getting ready to join 50+ other people gambling on games with a system that requires the result to be over and in the books to actually work.  And if they don’t lose money this way, they are supposedly the bad guy, the tard.  I think not.

Time For A Recap - What Is Gematria?

 So what exactly is gematria, or more to the point of this blog, what is conspiracy gematria?

Basically, it’s an introductory level course.  A teaser, a tiny crack in the opening of the conspiracy rabbit hole.  Its niche is a form of what I call conspiracy theory light.

I’m not going to dwell on the basics.  The big names recap the methodology on many, perhaps even most videos.  That should be a red flag in and of itself.  The long time viewers of the content don’t need that recap.  And the number of subscribers and active participants (as measured by views, likes and comments) never matches up with the desired view that it’s a growing practice that many are constantly waking up to and joining the party.

The formula is this:

Scapegoat + Baseless Conspiracy + Financial Hook = Words Turned Into Numbers Narrative.

The parlor trick is to find matching numbers, presented in the narrative, that indicates the narrative represents evidence that the assertions about the scapegoat and conspiracy theory are true.  In reality, these numbers invariably turn out to be two or three digits and have little statistical significance.  It’s up to the charisma of the presenter to sell the narrative.  Some are pretty good, some are average.  Some are laughably bad.  The best presenters have mastered the art of altering the numbers in bizarre manners beyond the basic A=1, B=2, C=3 format.  Multiple different calculations (ciphers) with different values for the letters, transpositions, reflections, use of lists (prime numbers so 11 is now 5 being the 5th prime number).

It can’t be stressed enough, all the cheap ways to alter the numbers combined with the golden rule about to be presented shortly, means quite literally it is impossible not to find a match if you put a little effort into it.

The Golden Rule:

You’re always allowed to disregard when you’re wrong.  If you use 10 different ciphers getting you 10 different values, 9 of them being wrong is instantly dismissed by that 1 that is right.  Psychologically, this spills over into real life never having to admit you’re wrong.  You just need to double down and run some other words and numbers and force it.

The Scapegoat

This is by far your common right wing extremist targets.  Historically it began with The Illuminati/Freemasons/NWO, but getting people used to their own personal demons and throwing in occasional potshots directly at the Jews - we didn’t expect anything else.  The money is always in the scapegoats that get the most attention.

The Financial Hook

It’s not really about the football, other than grifters see a way to have a side hustle with misinformation.  The most common hook though, is and always will be American Football.  It’s the most popular sport, the scoring system lends itself to a lot of juicy numbers in the target range.  In second place is the scammy nature of cryptocurrency.  Get rich quick schemes have more allure than the idea of an evil cabal.  The core idea is that the system is rigged by the scapegoat, and if you learn their secret code you can strike back and take money away from them.  This idea merges the common theme of baseless conspiracies.  So many people would be in on it, it would be impossible to keep it a secret.  That, and other common conspiracy impossibilities.  The easiest debunk, if the person doing gematria on a football game is winning lots of money, they would simply win lots of money betting themselves instead of selling the system to others.

The Conspiracies

There always baseless outrage clickbait based on yesterday’s news.  Maybe today’s if the celebrities involved are big name enough to warrant immediate attention.  By association the human brain associates the topics with the gematria coding.  And the topics are always NSFW, inappropriate for the dinner table, or victim shaming.  This lends itself to the air of secrecy - one has special knowledge and insight that the normies including family don’t understand.  And often times the normies just want to communicate that it’s a waste of time, but aren’t prepared to debunk the gematria on top of debunking the baseless conspiracy.

The Psychology of Gematria

Is driven by cognitive biases.  Confirmation bias rules the kingdom.  Recency bias has a high seat in the council.  Recency bias gets one matching up current events with a core block of evil numbers.  If the person doing gematria has been around awhile they won’t realize that some time ago those same numbers meant something else, and are funneled into what it means only for today.  If they’ve done the natural human thing of doing personalized gematria of themselves it causes an internal mental conflict when their personal numbers now suddenly mean something unwanted.

But the king of them all, confirmation bias is the big one. Through the same tactics that cults use a gematria using person needs to and learns to ignore the inevitability of evil numbers meaning their own life is one of evil.  When a conspiracist who genuinely believes the baseless conspiracy enters the rabbit hole, they have a pretty good idea that they aren’t a part of the scapegoat group.  Yet, through hammering home the ridiculous methods of identifying who is in on the evil conspiracy everyone else could be or is in on the evil conspiracy.  Even the fact that gematria conspiracy narratives always dwell on negativity is damaging.  You simply aren’t cool if you aren’t focusing on how evil someone or something else is.  Just ignore that technically the system you are using makes you a part of that same evil.  Your own personal thoughts on racism, homophobia, and politics are given a flimsy excuse to dominate internal mental gymnastics.

The grooming starts early, you aren’t just a random person aimlessly poking numbers into a gematria calculator, you’re a decoder. You are a secret agent uncovering hidden mysteries with your magical knowledge that can be used to predict the future.  And that is in defiance to the constant use of waiting until the daily news headlines are the source of events that already happened.  The follow up grooming is an intense patting each other on the back festival of compliments on finding any possible predictive outcome.  The community is decoding, and quite literally even if the group leader hasn’t obviously made a narrative for both teams, the community has.  It’s still ok to be wrong, as long as one person in the community is right.

It’s taken too long, but there is finally a sense that gematria and misinformation and “incoherent gibberish” are synonymous.  If we were to go back in time and analyze the previous content and tally up, manufactured gematria “evidence” is overwhelmingly pro right wing extremism at worst, neutral sports gambling and practically no pro left wing talk.

Catzerland

Catzerland, famous for their neutrality in all things regarding cats, can breathe a sigh of relief.  There’s been an increased interest in U.S. election information regarding cats.  And for a while it looked like our feline friends were part of a broad brush stroke stereotype as being a bad thing.

Specifically, JD Vance made a now infamous comment about childless cat ladies.  Your opinion was not important or valid if you owned a cat.  The poke was intended to as a dunk on childless people, the American dream of raising a good Christian family is allegedly what makes us great.  Without children, you have no pony in the race, no skin in the game.

Or no cat in the cooking pot, until a month later.

There are some constants about social media in the mix.  People love their pets, they love to argue about politics especially with low quality or even nonexistent information, people are assholes and hypocrites, and they love to meme.  So when we got the Vance comment the leftist “Republicans are weird” scene took it and rode with it to all its meme glory.  The culmination of this is that Vance is being slammed on Twitter for it 

https://x.com/JDVance/status/1833506757534175484

And Taylor Swift announced her endorsement of Harris/Walz signing off as a proud Childless Cat Lady.

But poor old Catzerland.  In the interest of displaying both sides of an argument like a neutral media source yearned for equal coverage.  What if you’re a GOP cat owner and are desperate for something to feed your love of cats and burning desire to vote with no logic or intellectual thought process?  Memes are not enough.  Well, now they have some skin in the game and a cat in the cooking pot.

https://www.npr.org/2024/09/11/nx-s1-5108401/donald-trump-debate-eating-dogs-cats-immigrants-false-stereotype

Someone poised with roughly a 50% chance to win a major election actually embraces a totally fictitious story about immigrants coming to eat your cats.  Like, that’s the purpose of their ‘invasion’.  Sure, there’s a lot of generic crime talk, but do bring up the topic during a televised debate shows a depth of doggedness (ha!) to stick to your speech style that is an art form.

And that speech style is to ramble, totally unconcerned with silly things like facts or coherence.  Like a gematria decode about cats, pointing out some useless gematria connections about AI cats.  Given another term in office, since appealing to a base of loony weirdos is more important than actual facts, we might just see Trump do an actual gematria presentation in a state of the union address.

In fairness to Catzerland and their dilemma, it’s not about true neutrality.  It’s more about capitalizing on the two extremes.  You love your cat!  Good for you, watch out for those scapegoated immigrant criminals!  You don’t like cats!  Good for you!  You love children and the <redacted> vision I have!  And Catzerland can always switch to ducks if the heat gets on.  People actually do eat ducks without much thought about them being fuzzy and cute like the uneasy feeling you may get about actually eating a cat.  It amazes even myself that I’m putting this much effort in to talking about eating cats as opposed to real problems with border security and immigration, it’s that much of a not a real thing non-issue.

This football season’s sports decodes should be lots of fun.  Gematria sports clowns love themselves a little bit of emotional forced narrative.  If there’s a cat themed mascot team in the college finals and/or the Super Bowl the temptation to make a big deal about the cat thing going on now will be like…catnip.  Conspiracy catnip.  And picking both sides is the oldest gematria sports grifter trick in the book.

A.I. - The New Rabbit Black Hole

On a related note, Zach just posted on Twixter yesterday a gripe about his Monday Night Football view count being only 3.3k views instead of the 330k he would have had in 2016.

The world doesn’t owe you views.  Just because your numbers were heavily padded by astroturfing for ages doesn’t mean it’s always going to be that way.  Previous sources have better things to do with their time and money, like military equipment above disinformation Patreon subscriptions.

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Things are an awful lot like before gematria became a Qanon spam weapon in the Trump election era.  That is you get sports stuff without a lot of political content.  Something like this:

The idea of supplementing gambling predictions with a lot of confusing nonsense to mask that you’re really just doing the same thing lots of sports predictors do with gematria and numerology.

And the Qanon gematria content has slowed down, too.  But if you want to use conspiracy lite content as baby’s first book of conspiracies to target the gullible, what do you use without gematria?  Chemtrails aren’t showing up much on my radar screen these days.  And that’s because the Weird Shit in the Sky crowd is going all in on A.I. content.  And at its core, it’s the exact same as gematria.

Instead of just being a commercial to try and hype sales of food, if you really believe that it’s purposeful subliminal advertising you have a confirmation bias problem.  And you’re a perfect fit to start off getting requests to get involved with worse content.  Maybe you jump on the next bandwagon of anti science content - there *will* be more pandemics in the future.  Maybe you would like to post about how much you hate libtards.  There *will* be polarized politics in the future.  Maybe it’s time to get the attention of law enforcement and use sovereign citizen tactics.  There *will* be taxes in the future.  Or maybe, after a couple different pit stops along these lines you can end up in a militia and genuinely think it’s time to overthrow the government.  There *might be* a government in the future.  It all depends on if rich white dudes have enough support from gullible useful idiots like you to allow it.

On the left side of the fake gematria equation is Popeyes.  The current event.  The new commercial coming from an impossibly huge database.  On the right side is 88.  A ludicrously small number to try and attribute any statistical significance to.  And it doesn’t matter that these make the whole equation stupid and pointless.  Like actual not conspiracy advertising it just matters what you think about it at the moment.  Right now 88 is Popeyes.  Tomorrow 88 will mean something else.  And 50 years from now, perhaps with Popeyes being a bankrupt faded memory, 88 will still mean Popeyes but nobody will ever think to mention that.

The same way that the gematria gurus trot out a new cipher like composite numbers or try to talk up a known future event like the path of the eclipse, the Weird Shit in the Sky crowd needed something different.  Something fresh and not gematria to talk about.  Something dumb enough that it identifies the gullible that think 88 has any special significance.  To lure them in, make some donations on associated fundraisers, and become a cult member ready to move on to bigger and brighter smaller and darker intellectual black hole things.  And that’s Artificial Intelligence.  Just like gematria decodes the blurry pictures are not so much a problem themselves.  The way they are manufactured is not important.  Zoom in on a picture, it will get blurry.  Freeze a video, it can show pixels in place of a smooth image.  And of course deliberate photoshop is on call.  These manufacturing techniques don’t escape the people that have the critical thinking skills to recognize the tricks.  But ultimately, it’s the associations they implant that matter.  And just like Qanon gematria it’s 99% Kamala, the Democrat, is up to no good.  Even though, just like gematria narratives could be shifted to the polar opposite the blurred pictures of Trump could be produced, but they aren’t.  At least not anywhere near the same quantity.

And as far as marketing goes it’s perfectly understandable.  The MAGA crowd is vastly more confirmation biased than any other major recognized political entity.  Blurry AI NFTs are probably in the works now.  Hell, if they could actually manufacture real, blurry Trump sneakers they would and they’d sell for $999 a pair.  That’s how far the confirmation bias Trump obsession has gone.