If I Were Truly A Paid For Troll

I would do a lot of things to be more annoying than I am now.


I know what the first on my list would be. I would look for everything that equals 113.


I'd buy me new computer. I need the ability to copy and paste text, which I currently lack. I'd get Excel so I can set up my own spreadsheet so I don't have to rely on what's available on the internet. Then do a lot of searching for 113's.




I'd also hire some staff. The paid for troll pay rate seems pretty good. I'd probably get one person dedicated to just 113. Every video, the title, the introduction, every comment would be copied and pasted. All the blog posts broken down by sentence, copied and pasted. Because fat fingering them in just takes too long. And not just 113 since we are to believe that 1103, 1130, 1103, 311 are all equal to 113.




Now that I think about it, I will need more staff. Beyond the things that actually equal 113 I'll need someone to do conversions. 617 is a must being the 113th prime number. That would be for the person dedicated to actual 113's. Underneath them is the person looking to convert everything else to 113. Just like the way Pi is artificially manufactured out of damn near every number. Let's see, 114 should count. The sum of the divisors of 113 is 114. I'll need someone creative.


There are lots of quotes from recognized historical figures, many of them authors. There surely must be some that equal 113. Yet another staff member needed. I tried a couple and they didn't fall into place before I got frustrated and put that project on hold. More copying and pasting...just to make the list complete.


That person will need an assistant. If we're going to cherry pick about phrasing, there should be a fact checker....how many times does a phrase appear. So if the phrase is usually "The God's Honest Truth" but 12% of the time shows as "It's the God's Honest Truth", which does equal 113 we don't make the mistake of using the absolutes of always or never. At least for the comfort of saying "mostly" or admitting a caveat of "occasionally" I can ease my conscious by having an honest effort put in to reporting a %.


And yet another staff member...the hearsay specialist. Dreams, interpretation of noises, recap of personal events shared. Surely these things have alternate terminology. If somebody blogged about a hobo being bitten by a weasel, maybe it really was just a homeless man and the weasel was just a wild animal. Someone will need to check and see; this might be a misinterpreted personal story.


And another staff member....
Someone will have to organize the daily 113 report. Surely a direct 113 means more than turned into 113. Alternate phrasing of a personal story should count less. But I don't know. It's not like anyone ever writes down rules to stick by. I can at least get the report organized into sections.


And we probably should hire another. They don't fact check themselves. So just in case the murderer's name is spelled wrong we want to know if it was a 113 if it was spelled right.


Dealing in absolutes is a two way street. I'm not the one that decided 113 always means dishonest. You guys did, a long time ago.


So compared to my being wrong about something about bitcoin vs. Bitcoin I doubt that people who stumble on this blog will care too much versus compared to 113 doesn't mean TRUE FACTS or VERACIOUS or 113 doesn't mean dishonest when applied to me and my friends. I haven't had any complaints from anyone who's opinion I care about.


If I do get properly staffed up by next Christmas it should be a hell of an office party.