Sunday, April 8, 2018

The Unrelenting Gematria Magnet Theory

This one is hard to pin down since as is usually the case the claimants provide no specific details on how their alternative version of reality would work.  Both the actual science behind the theory and explanation of what must end up being such a widespread conspiracy that it encompasses everyone on the planet.  With the exception of their group.  That would make sense that they are the gatekeepers of this special knowledge except the manner it’s presented:  It’s so obvious, why can’t the sheep see it?

The actual equations in the science involved are way out of my league.  So it’s safe to say that it’s way out their league, too.  That’s because it’s an escape hatch to explain something outside their own relentless lack of logic.  The more mundane duties such as offing a celebrity at the right day and time are relegated to the lower levels of the organizational flow chart, like the Masons.  Really bizarre things like guiding the development of what some consider to be evolution into making sure the human body has 206 bones, because you know, that’s got big plans for it ahead someday.  It is, after all a three digit number, so it must mean SOMETHING other than just being the number of bones in the human body.  That’s organic matrix escape hatching.

If you’ve been around long enough you’ve seen the go to escape hatch in sports is magnets. It’s so pervasive that nobody that believes that gematria works ever indicates that it might just have crossed that line between odd and totally impractical.  NBA shots are affected on their route to the hoop by magnets. Baseball seems to incorporate drones which by all accounts, or rather lack thereof, must be invisible drones.  They’ve been mentioned in football.  And although at least subconsciously I was hoping they would just shut up and find a better story, now any golf shot which yields a two digit number from a gematria elision (in other words, all of them) is affected by magnets.  Encompassing all the sports would make this post too long, so since golf is the topic du jour it’s the gulf of logic about golf discussed here.

Actual gematria “proof” is rare, although Jake Lebowski did turn one golf magnet into a 444.  And at least the moon landing is not a hoax, because a critic evoked a response from mikey James that suggested if we can send vehicles into outer space, it’s obvious we can put magnets in sports.  No, I take that back, he was clearly playing pigeon chess and we’re bound to see that the moon landing is in fact a hoax by someone under the operating standard of “Do you agree with me today?  Yes!  Cool!”

So I have to make some assumptions as a starting point with lack of details.  Since the Lebowski 444 involved neodymium magnets that’s as good a place as any.  Golf balls are made of rubber and plastic.  So making a whole golf ball out of metal to magnetize it is right out.  Weight and stuff, ya know.  So ferrous metal mixed within the ball like the way rubber and magnets are combined for refrigerator magnets must be the composition.  There must be some sort of on/off switch operating a powerful magnet like a neodymium electromagnet.  You can’t have it running all the time.  There are some shots you don’t want to roll towards the cup.  Even without the obvious electromagnetic anomaly of an always present sports magnet* always there will be a local effect when the magnet is switched on.

These magnets must not always be limited to the cup, although that is prime real estate for magnifying.  Sergio Garcia had his ball roll into the drink for his record of ineptitude.  So they’re spread around since they haven’t incorporated the Manchurian athlete into this story.  You know, the super human athlete than can do ANYTHING at any time.  That’s a different escape hatch.

So we need really powerful magnets that can affect a relatively small amount of magnetically affected material over an  area of a pretty wide field.  Forgetting about the cover up of hiding the magnets and paying hush money and all the cover up stuff, let’s just see more directly some of the science based results of magnet use they’ve forgotten about.

Jewelry
In order to make jewelry more sturdy and cheaper there’s not a lot of solid 100% gold or silver jewelry.  Gold and silver are not terribly magnetic, but the additions often are.  In fact, a test of whether a piece of jewelry is really precious is if it is affected by a magnet.  Now, in movies this is usually for comic relief as Batman’s utility belt buckle is magnetized by the villain pinning him to the wall behind him.  Or large objects flying at great speed across the room.  But it’s reasonable to expect that lots of golfers wear some kind of jewelry that would be affected by a powerful magnet.  At least a tug on a not completely gold necklace that would make him think, “My, wasn’t that odd??”  This effect could be extrapolated into the crowd.  Honey, let’s not go to Pinebrook this year.  Last year my cliptractor™️ went crazy in my pocket and my non digital watch stopped working.

Credit Cards/All Stripe Card
Leave them in the room.  They’re fucked.  You can screw up your credit card by running a magnet over the stripe.  Our stripe technology has gotten better to minimize this, but if you run a decent magnet directly over the stripe it’s a goner.  Lower security cards like a parking garage card would be even more susceptible.  Although I’m keeping the cover up portion mostly out of this, I do expect financial institutions would get frustrated by having to replace ATM cards for golfers and would probably take notice.

Compasses
This goes without saying, but it’s more of a lead in to the next category.  There are hiking trails around golf courses.  I would hope that people wouldn’t possibly get lost on these trails and wouldn’t need a compass.  But they are a prime candidate for noticing the effect of a powerful magnet being employed.  If someone happens to have a compass near a golf ball sucking magnetic field they will notice something odd is going on.  I think it’s a safe bet that some prankster Freemason won’t be able to resist the temptation to force the compasses to be 47 degrees.

Cellphones
In the early days of cellphones, direct obstruction of operation of the phone might have been an issue. Not anymore as magnetic issues have been addressed.  However, parts of the phone are magnetic.  You can even screw up your credit card without playing golf by putting your phone on top of it for an extended period of time.  Forget about loading Google maps and getting directions or any other application that requires your phone’s onboard compass.  Like, the ambulance knowing where you are if you have a, ahem, STROKE on the golf course and call 911.  Which leads to our last and really uncool part of the evil empire’s master plan to rig golf games.

Pacemakers/Medical Devices
We’ve come a long way from the days when you couldn’t microwave Debbie’s burrito around her Dad since it would screw up his pacemaker.  They still are a precision device that require being careful around microwave ovens.  The component of a microwave that makes the microwaves has a magnetron that has and will screw up the signals of a pacemaker.

So I did some digging and found that ticket sales of Thursday-Sunday passes for the Masters number about 40,000.  Between added numbers for the 2000 person capacity hotel nearby, daily tickets and staff, less the number of people not showing up that seems to me a generously low number of people attending on a given day.  I found a source quoting that there are about 3 million people wearing a pacemaker in the world.  If there are 7 billion people in the world:
3,000,000,000/7,000,000,000,000=0.043% x 40,000=17 people.  Or 18 people if you want to include the hotel.  That’s the odds of how many people a day with pacemakers alone will be subjected to magnetic fields from trying to rig a damn golf game to “mock” us.  Somehow I really don’t think so.

No, mikey.  It’s not obvious.  The burden of proof is on you to explain exactly how this technology works.  Crunch some numbers and then we’ll talk about the invisible drones and the basketball game attendees that are seated right by the rim are affected.

* Not to be confused with someone like Mark Cuban who would be better described as a sports magnate.

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